The worst smells I ever smelled, part 2

A few years ago I flew back to SF on 12/30 after about 10 days in NY for Christmas. I landed in the late morning and so was heading up to Tahoe for New Year’s the same day. Just enough time to unpack/repack and then hit the road. The power was out when I got into my apartment, but I didn’t think much about it since a) it was the middle of the day and b) I was leaving again for the next 3-4 days and assumed it would be back on by the time I returned. I finished there in about an hour and ran out the door. I was pulling my car out of the garage when I suddenly realize I forgot something upstairs. What did I forget, you ask?

The weed of course.

Where is the weed?

It’s in the freezer at this point.

So I run upstairs; car is packed and running, in my “driveway” where if I leave it for more than a few minutes I generally end up with a $100 ticket. I throw open the freezer and as this is happening (in slow motion), I simultaneously realize that a) the freezer has not been on in anywhere from 1 hour to 10 days, b) I’m about to experience one of the worst smells I ever smelled, c) I’ll most likely start dry heaving like I’m in training for the dry heaving Olympics and d) may even actually vomit. I have a sensitive nose and gag reflex, not a good combination. The freezer was full too. Ice cream, hamburger meat, I think some gravy and meatballs, frozen veggies, warm water festering in plastic trays. I’m dry heaving now just remembering it.

But there was no time to indulge my immediate and blindsiding nausea. I had to empty the freezer as quickly as possible. It was so nasty. I basically just threw every last thing in there into a garbage bag and tried not to look at anything. Of course now it’s occurring to me that the fridge is going to be just as nasty. I tossed every last thing in there – obviously. Full condiment reload when I returned.

I still have no idea how I didn’t projectile vomit. I think I just willed myself not to because I knew cleaning it up would exponentially make things more disgusting and begin a vicious cycle for which I had no time. Actually I may have puked into the sink at one point now that I think about it. Regardless, it was some of the most violent dry heaving that I have ever done.

But here’s the thing: Thank goodness I became a stoner or it all would have gone another 3-4 days in that room temperature freezer. Because I do feel that at some point over those 3-4 days in Tahoe it would have occurred to me that the fridge would be off because the power was off and there’s just no way I would have been able to enjoy myself knowing all that food was just festering in there, waiting for me. That would have been an even worse smell to smell. And no, I didn’t get a ticket either!